Handling The Emotions Of A Break Up
The longer you’re attached to somebody, the harder it is to go through a break up. Even if the break was the best thing to do at this point, it’s still hard. And even if you haven’t been together all that long, many of the same emotions can surface, and with the same intensity. If you can successfully navigate these feelings, you will have a better chance of making up if that’s what you’d like to do. Whether that’s your goal or not, there’s no doubt that being more emotionally stable will help you live a happier life.
Do you feel like it’s your fault that you broke up? Is it? Regardless, you need to let go of the feelings of guilt. Come to understand that this is the way things are now, and you can’t change the past. However, if you have done something that requires an apology, let the situation calm down for a while, then apologize to help clear your conscience.
One emotion that may shock you a bit is that of relief. Sure, you’re sad, feeling bummed out, but why do you feel a sense of comfort? Rest assured, it’s a common feeling, and perfectly normal. Almost every couple argues, and it tends to get worse just prior to a break up. Another problem that adds to the tension is not knowing what’s going on, and splitting up gives you the answer.
Being angry needs to be kept in check. If at any point you feel like expressing your anger in a destructive way, seek help. Forgive anybody who needs to be forgiven, including you. This will go a long way towards not being mad. Anger can make you do funny things and clouds your judgment. It certainly won’t garner the respect of those around you. Do whatever it takes to work through your anger, otherwise you could grow to be old and bitter; and that’s not a good combination.
The one emotion that nearly everybody has after breaking up is sadness. Crying and some sadness is normal, but watch out for clinical depression. Seek professional help immediately if you feel like harming yourself. Other than that, if you don’t feel like getting out of bed, can’t let go of feeling down, or want to stay isolated then find a trusted friend (or counselor) to talk things over with.
To be honest, there is no simple way to deal with all of the emotions that go along with breaking up. Being able to get through them in a healthy way will increase your chances of making up in the future. Or, it will help you move on to the next relationship with no hard feelings. Either way, you are sure to be happier and live a better life because of it.